Last September, my mother forced me to go back, yet again, to BYU Idaho to finish my associate's degree in vocal performance, even though I explained to her that I wanted to stay in Utah, move to Ogden with Broc and attend Weber State.
My mom told me 'not to throw my life away with a boy I'm just dating.
Little did she know I was madly in love with this boy and planning on marrying him.
Did I still throw my life away, mom? I think not. Broc IS my life.
ANYWAY, so I toughed out another semester (and if you haven't been to BYU I in the winter semester, you have NO idea how cold and miserable it is, especially if cold isn't your thing) and got engaged RIGHT in the middle of it (Halloween to be exact) which made the semester even harder.
All I could think about was Broc.
I was spending all my time and money finding ways to get home and see him EVERY SINGLE weekend.
Crying myself to sleep every night because my pillow smelled like him, and I was using his baby blanket to keep me warm during the cold nights.
Waiting with baited breathe, staring at my phone for a text or a call from my loving and very missed fiance.
Crying everytime we had to say goodbye, and telling him to call me AS SOON as he can, even if it's 45 seconds later.
Reading his letters and poems over and OVER and OVER again, heart breaking every word he wrote to me.
Then FINALLY, I went home the final weekend, brought Broc back to Rexburg with me, and left for good 3 days later....thanking God that I would never return to that school, and even if I did, I wouldn't be alone. I'd be married, and there would be no way anyone could tear us apart and make rules and regulations for our relationship.
You know what I just realized......? I HATED dating Broc.
Not because of him, not in the least bit! Because we were told how to date, how to be engaged, what to do, where to do it, and how. For EVERY LITTLE THING we did together. And now I am beyond grateful that every night I am able to spend it having a 'sleep over' with my best friend, and waking up to him every morning, knowing that he isn't going anywhere.
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